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Tuesday, March 06, 2007

had migraine again today. well... think of loads stuff in my mind

yesterday, didn't get to blog as i visit my uncle in SGH. quite sad. who doesn't. i mean only people wif no feelin's dat doesn't feel sad or sympathy. im quite surprised wen some people actually "ignore" their own uncle when all we can actually gv moral support to him. family is importance for me... i will give my uncle e most moral support i cld. pray to God he will hang on there

study cashflow yesterday n supposedly budgeting today. but sumhow, i still need to "buck up" on my cashflow so ya... went to lin's place to study n stuff. sumhow... my mind is in disorder now

7 days to go for my Advanced Accountings II.... 9 more days to go for my Auditing. 9 days left.... after dat, all dat are left are juz memories... of her n me. wad im supposed to do? such a fickle-minded person i am. i hate her so much... e more i hate, e more i miss her. but i promise to myself... everything will go juz fine. she's happy w/o me by her side. even though she's now more closer to irda n mai, im happy. at least, i know, once upon a time, she was once happy wif me by her side, as her "gal"fren. now dat she's happy, i cant be more of that. am i happy? everyone ask me dat question. but wad could my answer be? hate her? im juz lying to myself. miss her? wad could i do. all i could do is blogging here, and express everything. this cant be reality. she have hate me.... n she's happier now than before

i have zie, steph n everyone... but why muz i think of her wen im alone, sitting back doing reminiscing? i mean, those memories juz come n.. ya... i miz her. im sorry my frens... but i cant keep lyin' to myself. i know... wadeva she hav done before, hurt u guys but still.... she's my bezfren, once. i cant simply throw her out of my life? im stupid, i admit it. but wad could i do? im helpless. i jush wish i dun even know her, but its fated for us to meet n become fren, bezfren. i love her lyk my own sis, that's all! y do people think to e extend dat we're an item? worse, people who know me for lyk 8 yrs.... even have e guts to BACKSTABBED me? do i deserved it? i nvr disturb people's life. y muz U disturb my life? y cant i be happy wif e person i Love? she's my bezfren, but yet..... ever since our frenship on e rocks, these eyes, these pair of eyes cant stop dripping and flowing down the cheek. Ur my fren, how could u even do this to me? why? i did not offend u guys, y people cant see me happy wif the one i love? people dun understand our frenship, but yet, y are they bugging us wif their problems? do we Ever, Ever offended u guys in e 1st place? i dun understand... i jz dun understand it...

the controversial picture that cause us wad we are now....

now... everything's too late. we are strangers. history cant be changed. Shikin, aku harap kau bahagia disamping Faz dan bezfren baru kau, irda. aku da kecewakan persahabatan kita. aku tahu kau bahagia tanpa aku sbagai teman kau. bila kau da tunang nanti, jadilah tunang yang baik dan ubah lah perangai kau yang mane aku pernah tegur dahulu. hidup mesti di teruskan... kau tetap dalam hati aku, sebagai kawan karibku. airmata yang mengalir ini adalah airmata kenangan kita bersama. moga Allah panjangkan umur kau dan moga kau bahagia disamping orang tercinta. terima kasih kerana kau pernah berkongsi suka, tawar dan duka di saat aku perlukan teman. ur e bez... tiada penggantimu di hati... kau akan tetap jadi kawan karibku, Dunia dan Akhirat.... itu lah janjiku pada kau. seandainya aku yg pergi dulu, ingat lah bahwa kau tak pernah hilang dari sisiku walau seminit pon... sayang kau slalu...






Blogged @ 9:45 PM